Soldiers are required to follow strict military codes of conduct that govern their behavior while they serve. These codes often require them to be physically and mentally tough, to suppress emotions, and to subordinate themselves to their superiors.
These same codes also demand that soldiers maintain their physical health, eat well, exercise regularly, get enough rest, and take care of their appearance. How do soldiers reconcile these personal needs for affection and intimacy with hierarchical and professional obligations?
What is the hierarchy in the military?
The military is a highly structured organization where officers are expected to give orders and enlisted personnel are expected to obey them. There is a clear chain of command in which every soldier knows who outranks whom. This structure creates a power dynamic in which some soldiers have more authority than others. Officers must demonstrate leadership skills, such as courage, selflessness, integrity, and commitment. They must set an example for their troops through their own actions and decisions. Enlisted personnel are responsible for carrying out the orders given to them and following the rules of the military.
How does this affect soldiers' relationships?
The hierarchy within the military can make it difficult for soldiers to form close relationships with one another. Soldiers may feel hesitant to share personal information or express emotional vulnerability with those they work with. They may fear being seen as weak or unprofessional if they open up about their feelings or need for connection. In addition, soldiers may not want to develop strong bonds with fellow service members because they know they will eventually leave the military and go their separate ways.
The military provides many opportunities for soldiers to connect with each other outside of work. Many units participate in social events together, such as parties, barbecues, and trips to the beach. These activities allow soldiers to let down their guard and build trust with one another. Soldiers may also bond over shared experiences, like surviving combat missions or dealing with the stress of deployment. Some units even provide counseling services to help soldiers process the challenges of war and cope with PTSD symptoms.
What about romantic relationships in the military?
Romantic relationships between officers and enlisted personnel are generally discouraged in the military due to concerns about power dynamics and professionalism.
Many soldiers still pursue relationships with civilians while serving. Online dating apps and websites have become popular among active-duty military personnel looking for love. Long-distance relationships can be particularly challenging, especially if a soldier is deployed overseas for an extended period of time. The uncertainty of when they will see each other next can cause tension and anxiety.
For soldiers who are married or in committed relationships, separation can be difficult. Couples must find creative ways to stay connected despite physical distance, such as writing letters, sending care packages, and scheduling video calls. Military couples often struggle with issues related to communication, intimacy, and emotional support, just like any other couple. They may need to make sacrifices and adjustments to maintain their relationship while apart.
How do soldiers manage intimacy needs during deployment?
Deployment is a major challenge for military service members who want to preserve their personal relationships at home. Deployments typically last several months to a year, during which time soldiers may not have access to internet or phone service. This makes it difficult to maintain regular contact with loved ones. In addition, the stress and danger of combat can take a toll on mental health and lead to feelings of isolation and loneliness.
Some soldiers turn to online therapy or counseling services to help them cope with these emotions. Others rely on their unit mates for support, sharing stories and confiding in one another about their experiences. Some even form close bonds with their fellow soldiers that border on intimacy but don't cross into sexual territory. These platonic relationships provide companionship, comfort, and emotional connection without violating professional boundaries.
The military environment presents unique challenges to soldiers who desire affection and intimacy. While it may seem counterintuitive to prioritize personal needs when serving in a hierarchical organization, many soldiers are able to balance their obligations and desires by finding creative ways to connect with others.
How do soldiers reconcile personal needs for affection and intimacy with hierarchical and professional obligations?
Soldiers can reconcile their need for intimacy and affection with their professional and hierarchical obligations by finding ways to communicate and connect with others while remaining focused on the task at hand. This includes setting aside time for socializing and building relationships outside of work hours, maintaining strong communication channels with colleagues and superiors, being aware of boundaries and professionalism, and seeking out support and resources when needed.