Most religions teach that sexual intercourse is allowed within marriage between a man and a woman for procreation and intimacy. Some also allow for non-procreative intercourse and masturbation to avoid unrestrained desire. They condemn premarital sex, extramarital sex, homosexuality, bestiality, prostitution, pornography, and incest.
They do not offer much advice on how to resolve conflicts about mutual erotic expression that may arise in marriages.
Religious teaching discourages excessive focus on physical pleasure and sensual stimulation. It encourages self-control, modesty, and purity of thought and action. This can lead to frustration and resentment among spouses who feel deprived of erotic fulfillment. Some couples seek help from spiritual leaders or counselors to reconcile their differences. Others may consult secular professionals such as psychologists, therapists, and sex educators.
Some religions have specific guidelines for erotic expression in marriage.
Islam prescribes strict privacy and modesty during foreplay and intercourse. Christianity recommends frequent prayer before, during, and after lovemaking. Judaism suggests limiting intercourse to missionary position with no physical contact outside of it. Hinduism emphasizes maintaining mental and physical fitness through yoga, meditation, and diet. Buddhist teachings urge compassion, honesty, and respect in all relationships.
Many cultures link sexual attraction to love and commitment rather than mere physical gratification. Thus, erotic expression is often limited by social norms and expectations, family obligations, and economic circumstances. Religion reinforces these restrictions, even when they are unhealthy and oppressive. Men may use violence or threats to control women's sexual behavior. Women may be expected to hide their feelings or submit to coercive demands. Children may be taught that sex is shameful or dangerous.
Religious beliefs about sin, redemption, and divine judgment shape views on mutual erotic expression. They influence attitudes toward body image, gender roles, sexual orientation, and partner selection. These beliefs can create barriers to open communication and compromise within couples. Religious institutions may also contribute to stigma, discrimination, and violence against LGBTQ+ people, non-heteronormative identities, and alternative lifestyles.
Religious teaching influences attitudes towards mutual erotic expression in various ways. It shapes cultural expectations, affects individual values, and impacts intimate relationships. While some religions promote healthy communication and self-discovery, others perpetuate harmful stereotypes and abuse. Addressing this topic requires sensitivity, knowledge, and skill in both secular and spiritual spheres.