Military Service
The military is known for its strict rules, regulations, and hierarchy, which are enforced through various means including physical punishments, social sanctions, and verbal abuse. As such, it creates a unique environment that shapes the personalities, beliefs, and behaviors of those who serve in it. This includes how they view themselves and their place in society, what they believe to be acceptable behavior, and what they consider normal or desirable in terms of interpersonal interactions. One way this shows up is in veterans' expectations regarding romantic and sexual relationships after leaving active duty.
Emotional Expectations
In the military, soldiers must maintain emotional control even when faced with extreme stressors like combat or loss of comrades. They may become accustomed to suppressing strong feelings in favor of more neutral or positive ones. This can lead them to have difficulty expressing affection, vulnerability, or intimacy in civilian life.
They might find it difficult to cry or show weakness around others, leading to isolation from potential partners. They may also struggle to form close bonds due to a lack of trust or experience in healthy communication. In turn, this can impact their ability to form lasting romantic relationships or even friendships outside the military.
Sexual Expectations
The military's emphasis on discipline, obedience, and order can make sex seem like something that should only happen within certain parameters - often limited by rank or gender roles. Veterans may expect a certain level of control over their partner during sex, which could lead to difficulties if their partner wants to experiment or explore different positions or practices.
Veterans may struggle with transitioning back into civilian life, where there are no uniforms, hierarchies, or explicit rules governing behavior. This can cause confusion about what is acceptable in public spaces or dating situations.
In what ways does communal military living shape veterans' post-service sexual and emotional expectations?
Communal military living shapes veterans' post-service sexual and emotional expectations by providing them with experiences that are often atypical of civilian life. Veterans often form close relationships within their unit while deployed, which can affect how they view intimate relationships upon returning home. Military culture emphasizes loyalty and teamwork, which may make it difficult for some veterans to transition to individualistic civilian society.