The military is often considered to be one of the most stressful environments that anyone can work in. The constant threat of danger and the need for extreme focus on tasks can take a toll on even the strongest person. It's no surprise then that military personnel experience a higher rate of mental health problems than the general population. This can include issues like PTSD (post-traumatic stress disorder), anxiety, depression, and substance abuse. When someone is dealing with these kinds of things, it can be difficult for them to maintain a healthy relationship - both romantic and otherwise. But what about when you add in shared trauma?
When two people have gone through something traumatic together, they may feel more connected to each other. They understand what the other person has been through and can provide support and empathy in a way that others might not be able to.
This doesn't always translate well into sexual intimacy or communication. In fact, it can sometimes lead to the opposite effect.
One study found that couples who had experienced a traumatic event were less likely to communicate about their needs and desires regarding sex. The researchers suggested that this could be because talking about sex was seen as taboo in some cultures, or because there wasn't enough time to discuss it due to the stresses of everyday life.
Many veterans struggle with intimacy due to physical injuries from war or childhood trauma.
One man described how he lost his genitals in battle but still wanted to please his wife sexually. He tried everything possible, but nothing worked until he finally sought out medical help. Another woman said she couldn't connect with her husband after he returned home from deployment because she didn't know how to deal with his nightmares or flashbacks.
Despite all of these challenges, some military couples find ways to stay close even during difficult times. One couple told us how they would often use role-playing scenarios involving fantasies of being rescued by their partner during combat situations. Others talked about how important it is for them to keep the lines of communication open even when things are tense between them - no matter how hard that may be at times.
Shared experiences like those created by military service don't have to destroy relationships if both partners are willing to work together towards a healthy future.
How do shared traumatic experiences affect sexual communication, intimacy, and relational cohesion in military couples?
The impact of shared trauma on military couples' sexual communication, intimacy, and relational cohesion is complex. Trauma can lead to feelings of fear, anxiety, and mistrust, which can make it difficult for partners to communicate openly about their needs, desires, and boundaries. It can also lead to physical and emotional injuries that may affect sexual functioning and desire.