Guilt is an unpleasant feeling caused by consciousness of something done wrong or improper, followed by a desire to make restitution or to avoid it in the future. Guilt can be experienced by people of all ages, genders, ethnicities, races, nationalities, religions, and social classes. It differs from regret which relates to choices made or actions taken that one would do differently if they had another chance. Religious guilt is related to religious beliefs, practices, or rituals whereas secular guilt refers to nonreligious concepts such as morality, conscience, cultural norms, societal expectations, or personal values. Both types of guilt impact sexual identity but may do so in different ways due to their source.
Religious guilt tends to arise from breaking religious laws or commandments.
In Islam, adultery is forbidden and punishable by death. Someone who engages in extramarital sex may feel guilty for violating religious principles, potentially leading to depression, anxiety, self-blame, suicidal thoughts, or even murder-suicide. In contrast, secular guilt results from transgressing societal norms or moral codes. Someone who cheats on their partner without remorse may experience less guilt than someone who believes their action is immoral according to religious beliefs.
Another difference between religious and secular guilt is how it affects sexual attraction and behavior. Religious guilt often involves feelings of shame about same-sex attractions, desires, or acts.
A Catholic priest who experiences homosexual urges may feel guilty because the Church condemns any expression of gay identity or activity. Secular guilt can also lead to similar feelings, especially when one's values conflict with societal attitudes toward LGBTQ+ people.
Some individuals may be more accepting of their desires and explore them regardless of external pressures, resulting in less internalized stigma and guilt.
The degree to which religious and secular guilt influence sexual identity can vary greatly depending on individual beliefs, upbringing, culture, and context. While both types of guilt can promote sexual conservatism, they differ in terms of severity, duration, and impact on mental health. Religious guilt tends to persist longer due to fear of divine retribution, while secular guilt may subside after confessing to loved ones, seeking forgiveness, and/or receiving therapy. In addition, religious guilt may cause greater distress as it challenges core religious beliefs and self-identity whereas secular guilt may be perceived as personal failure rather than spiritual deficiency.