How to Communicate Unusual Sexual Desires Without Fear of Rejection
Unlike in porn movies, most people do not feel comfortable expressing their sexual desires. It is very common to have fantasies that are different from what society considers 'normal' or 'common'. This can be anything from role-playing games to specific positions, fetishes, or even BDSM. However, it is difficult to communicate these desires because they might seem too 'weird' or 'strange' to your partner. In this article, I will explain how you can overcome this fear and talk about them without feeling judged or rejected. The First Step: Understanding Your Partner
The first step is understanding your partner's mindset. Have you considered whether he/she might also have unusual desires? If so, then maybe they would be more open to yours. You could start by asking if there is something they would like to try, but are afraid to bring up. Once you have established trust and safety, you should proceed to the next steps. Second Step: Be Specific and Precise
Specificity is key when communicating anything related to sex. Use clear language instead of vague descriptions. For example, don't say "I want to tie you up" - say "I want to tie your hands behind your back while we make love". Avoid using euphemisms or slang terms; use precise words for body parts, actions, and sensations. This makes it easier for your partner to understand exactly what you mean and avoid confusion. Third Step: Make it a Game
Instead of directly talking about your desires, suggest that you play a game where you both take turns saying what you would like to do in bed. It might feel less intimidating than just sitting down and discussing things directly. Also, keep an open mind and consider any ideas your partner has to offer. Fourth Step: Emphasize on Pleasure
Communication is not just about expressing yourself; it's also about listening to your partner. Focus on their pleasure rather than your own fantasies. Ask questions about what they enjoy doing and emphasize their needs above yours. This shows respect and consideration, which will help them understand that your desires come from a place of mutual understanding and care. Fifth Step: Build Trust and Communicate Safely
If your partner still seems hesitant after all this, build trust by establishing safe words and boundaries beforehand. These are phrases or gestures that signal you need to stop immediately if something goes wrong. Remember that communication is a two-way street; talk about your fears and insecurities as well as your desires. If necessary, seek professional guidance or couples therapy to overcome the stigma around sexuality. Conclusion
Communicating unusual sexual desires can be scary but rewarding if done correctly. Follow these steps to create an environment of trust and safety where you can share your deepest wishes without fear of rejection or judgment. By building a strong foundation of respect and consideration, you can explore new possibilities together and create deeper intimacy.