In many religions, there are stories that contain important messages about how men and women should behave in their roles during intercourse. These myths can be interpreted to mean that women should take a passive role and wait for men to make the first move while men should take charge and lead the way. This interpretation is based on the belief that women's nature is more receptive than active, so they need to be courted before they can respond positively. On the other hand, men are expected to be more aggressive and proactive, taking the initiative to pursue sexual encounters.
The story of Adam and Eve from Genesis is one example where this gendered expectation is encoded. In the story, God creates Eve from Adam's rib and places her under his protection. She then gives birth to Cain, who becomes the first murderer. This suggests that it was up to Adam to protect Eve and be responsible for their relationship. The Bible also says that "man shall leave father and mother" (Genesis 2:24), implying that men are supposed to be independent and assertive. Women, on the other hand, are described as being submissive and obedient. They are told to obey their husbands and submit to them (Ephesians 5:22-24).
Another biblical story that reinforces these expectations is the account of Samson and Delilah. Samson is portrayed as a strong man with superhuman strength but is easily seduced by a woman. This shows how men are vulnerable to temptation and must be cautious in their interactions with women. Delilah betrays him by cutting his hair, which symbolizes his power and virility, and he is captured and blinded. It could be interpreted as a warning against letting down your guard and not staying true to yourself.
In Hinduism, there are stories about Krishna, a god known for his playful flirtations with women. He is often depicted as taking advantage of women without regard for their feelings or consent. These tales suggest that men should approach women with confidence and directness, even if it means crossing boundaries. On the flip side, women are expected to accept this behavior and behave passively until they are approached. This can lead to unhealthy relationships where one partner dominates while the other submits.
In Islam, the Quran tells men to take care of their wives physically, emotionally, and financially. It also instructs women to submit to their husbands and be patient with their sexual desires. This suggests that men should be proactive in satisfying their partners' needs, while women should be submissive and wait for their husband's initiative.
Some scholars argue that both genders have equal rights to pursue pleasure in marriage. They point out that the Quran says that "your spouses are a tilth for you so come to your tilth when and how you will" (Quran 2:223).
Religious myths encode gendered expectations of initiative and receptivity in sex based on the belief that men should take charge and women should follow. While these expectations may seem archaic or unfair, they persist in many cultures and continue to shape our attitudes towards intimacy and sexuality.