Sexual obligation has been an integral part of marriages since time immemorial. Religious teachings, which form the basis of many cultural norms, also prescribe how couples are supposed to engage in sexual activities during their married life. This paper delves into these concepts and explores its impact on erotic satisfaction and gender dynamics.
The Bible is one such source that prescribes how marriages must be conducted according to God's will. It states that marriage is a sacred union between man and woman who become "one flesh" after consummating it through sexual intercourse (Genesis 2:24). The Old Testament prescribes that husbands have a right over their wives' bodies, including the right to demand sex whenever they want (1 Corinthians 7:3-5). This means that wives cannot refuse their husband's sexual advances unless he gives them permission or she does so out of kindness. Thus, wives are obliged to fulfill their husband's physical needs, even if they do not feel like doing so. In addition, men are encouraged to satisfy their wives' sexual desires, but women should not seek gratification outside their marriage.
Islamic laws mandate that married couples engage in sexual intercourse as much as possible (Quran 2:187). This implies that both partners must meet each other's sexual needs, ensuring mutual satisfaction.
The Quran also forbids adultery, homosexuality, premarital and extramarital relationships, and lustful thoughts (Quran 17:32; 24:30-31), which could make satisfying intimacy difficult for some individuals. Moreover, the Quran instructs Muslims to avoid excessive indulgence in worldly pleasures, including sexual pleasure, as it can lead to sin (Quran 2:168; 2:219). As such, some Muslim scholars argue that sexual obligation is limited by religious teachings, leading to gender imbalance and erotic dissatisfaction.
Hinduism views sex as a necessary part of life, but its purpose goes beyond procreation. It emphasizes that sexual pleasure between married couples leads to emotional intimacy, which further strengthens their bond. Therefore, Hindus believe that sexual pleasure is essential for maintaining marriages.
This does not mean that wives have no choice or control over when they want to be intimate with their husbands. The wife may deny her husband if she doesn't feel like doing so, but he cannot force himself on her against her will. Instead, couples are encouraged to negotiate and discuss their needs openly to ensure mutual gratification.
In Buddhism, sexual activity is seen as an act of passion, which should not interfere with one's spiritual journey. Thus, practicing monks and nuns must abstain from sex entirely, while lay people must limit themselves to marriage. Even then, Buddha advises them not to engage in sexual activity without moderation and self-control (Buddhist scriptures, Vinaya). This suggests that sexual activities should not be compulsory, and both partners should respect each other's wishes and desires.
Judaism also considers sex within marriage as vital for building trust and intimacy. Hence, the Talmud states that spouses should satisfy each other's physical needs regularly (Talmud Bavli, Nedarim 20b). Still, it allows for refusing such requests under certain circumstances, including menstruation, pregnancy, or a lack of desire (Talmud Bavli, Niddah 41a). As such, Judaism recognizes that some individuals may not always be willing to participate in sexual acts and provides a way out.
The religious teachings discussed above demonstrate how sexual obligations vary across different religions and cultures.
All these doctrines emphasize the importance of marital intimacy and maintaining healthy relationships through sexual interactions. While some of these teachings can lead to gender imbalance and erotic dissatisfaction, they can also promote understanding, empathy, and communication between couples.
How is sexual obligation framed within religious marriage doctrines, and what effects does this have on erotic satisfaction and gender dynamics?
Religious marriage doctrines often frame sexual obligation as a duty that married couples owe each other for creating new life, maintaining the continuity of their lineage, or preserving family values. This can lead to feelings of guilt or shame if one partner is not satisfied with their sex life, which can negatively impact both partners' mental health and self-esteem.