How does shared trauma exposure influence sexual satisfaction, trust, and relational resilience in military couples?
The term "shared trauma" refers to experiences that are perceived as threatening and distressing by one or both partners in a relationship. It is often accompanied by feelings of fear, terror, helplessness, loss of control, and disorientation. Shared traumas include combat, injury, near death experiences, accidents, natural disasters, or witnessing violence against others. Research shows that shared trauma can have detrimental effects on many aspects of romantic relationships. In particular, it can negatively impact trust, intimacy, communication, commitment, and sexual satisfaction. This article will explore how shared trauma exposure affects these key elements of military couples' relationships.
Trust
Shared trauma can undermine trust between military couples for several reasons. First, it can lead to post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD) symptoms such as hypervigilance, avoidance, and negative changes in cognitive processes like memory and attention. These symptoms make it difficult for individuals to trust their partners because they may be constantly scanning for danger and unable to fully engage with them emotionally. Second, shared trauma can cause partners to feel distant from each other because they may not share common ground due to different levels of exposure or reactions to the trauma. Third, shared trauma can lead to betrayal, which can erode trust even further.
If a partner keeps secrets about his/her experience during deployment, this can create mistrust and resentment.
Shared trauma can lead to suspicion and paranoia, making it hard to believe one's partner is truly being honest or open.
Shared trauma can weaken the foundation of trust necessary for healthy relationships to flourish.
Intimacy
Trauma survivors often struggle with feeling connected to others. They may withdraw from their partners or become preoccupied with the trauma itself. This can create distance and difficulty with physical closeness and intimacy.
Trauma can change how people view themselves and their partners, leading to feelings of shame or guilt that can impede connection. Shared trauma can also alter one's perception of oneself as deserving of love and care, undermining self-esteem and the ability to offer intimacy.
Shared trauma can reduce opportunities for couples to connect through emotional bonds and physical contact, reducing sexual satisfaction in the process.
Communication
Shared trauma can hinder communication between military couples by increasing conflict over issues related to the trauma such as PTSD symptoms or changes in behavior. Partners may have difficulty understanding each other's perspectives on the trauma or be unable to express their needs due to fear or shame. Trauma can also disrupt communication patterns by creating tension or avoidance, which can make it difficult to share thoughts and feelings.
Trauma can cause individuals to blame their partners for the traumatic event, creating resentment and further strain on communication. Without effective communication, couples cannot work through problems, resolve conflicts, and develop a deeper understanding of each other's needs, desires, and perspectives, all critical components of healthy relationships.
Commitment
Shared trauma can erode commitment by making it harder for couples to stay connected during deployment or separation. It can lead to doubts about future plans or goals, questioning whether the relationship is worth continuing. Trauma survivors may feel guilty about leaving their partners while deployed or worried about returning home with changed priorities. In some cases, trauma can even lead to infidelity or breaking up altogether. Shared trauma can also create distance and loneliness, leading couples to drift apart emotionally and physically. This lack of connection makes it challenging to maintain a strong bond and sense of commitment.
Shared trauma exposure has significant negative effects on romantic relationships, particularly among military couples. It can undermine trust, intimacy, communication, and commitment while reducing sexual satisfaction.
These effects are not inevitable; couples who have a solid foundation of support, respect, and love before the trauma may be better equipped to weather its impacts.
Seeking professional help such as counseling or therapy can promote healing, strengthen communication, and improve overall relationship functioning. By addressing shared trauma openly and honestly, couples can build resilience and reconnect after traumatic experiences.
How does shared trauma exposure influence sexual satisfaction, trust, and relational resilience in military couples?
According to researchers, shared trauma exposure can significantly impact sexual satisfaction, trust, and relational resilience among military couples. Traumatic experiences such as combat deployments or posttraumatic stress disorder (PTSD) may lead to increased distrust and suspicion between partners, reduced communication and intimacy, and negative changes in sexual behavior.