How does religion affect sexual secrecy? Religious texts describe sex as shameful, dirty, sinful, or even punishable. Therefore, many people feel guilt, embarrassment, or fear when talking about it, especially with their parents, teachers, friends, or community members.
These feelings are sometimes misplaced because the Bible never calls sex 'shameful' or 'dirty' but rather 'good' (Genesis 2:24-25; Song of Solomon). On the contrary, religious discourses encourage discretion, privacy, modesty, and self-control.
God instructs the Israelites to cover up nakedness (Genesis 3:21), not reveal private affairs (Proverbs 11:13), be faithful to one partner for life (Malachi 2:15), avoid pornography (Psalms 101:3), and protect marriages from infidelity (Jeremiah 3:2). So, how do religions promote sexual secrecy through honor codes?
They emphasize purity and chastity as virtues that uphold family values. In Islam, women must dress conservatively to prevent sexual temptation (Quran 70:29-30) and men must be responsible for their actions (Quran 16:116). Second, they condemn promiscuity by emphasizing fidelity in marriage (Ecclesiastes 5:4), adultery (Mark 10:11), and divorce (Matthew 19:8-9). Third, they prescribe marriage as a sacred union between two partners who share everything, including sexual pleasures and intimacy (Song of Songs 4:9-10).
They require discretion by teaching modest conduct (Luke 17:2-3), respecting authority (Romans 13:1-2), and avoiding gossip (Leviticus 19:16; Luke 17:1-2).
Religious teachings on honor affect sexual secrecy by setting high standards for relationships, encouraging self-control, and maintaining privacy. But these ideals can create unhealthy pressures on people who want to explore sexually or find true love outside the church. As a result, some break away from religion altogether or turn to pornography, infidelity, or other vices. This article explores how religious discourses on honor influence sexual secrecy, challenges its cultural norms, and offers advice for balancing faith with desire.