How do couples maintain emotional teamwork when trauma erodes trust in oneself, one's partner, or the world at large?
Traumatic events can damage trust in oneself, one's partner, and the world.
Traumatic events, such as natural disasters, wars, accidents, abuse, illnesses, betrayals, or deaths, can shatter people's sense of safety and security in themselves, their partners, and the wider society they live in. This can lead to feelings of distrust, isolation, anger, guilt, shame, hopelessness, fear, confusion, anxiety, and depression. The effects are especially severe for those who have experienced multiple or chronic traumas.
Couples may find it easier to cope with these changes if they learn how to work together as a team, keeping an open mind, supporting each other, and seeking professional help if needed.
How trauma affects self-trust
Traumatic experiences can undermine people's faith in themselves and their perception of their strengths and abilities. They can trigger memories, thoughts, and emotions that make them feel unsafe, unworthy, helpless, out of control, or unable to make good decisions. This can increase self-doubt, pessimism, and mistrust of others and even their own judgement. It is normal to question why they failed to prevent or predict a tragedy or protect loved ones, but blaming themselves may exacerbate the pain. To rebuild self-trust, individuals need time, support, and guidance from qualified professionals.
How trauma affects relationship trust
Traumas can erode trust between partners by making them feel abandoned, powerless, angry, resentful, insecure, or guilty. Survivors may be less willing to share vulnerabilities, while their partners may withdraw emotionally, become critical, or avoid talking about difficult topics. Avoidance can escalate into mistrust, leading to misunderstandings, accusations, and a cycle of conflict. Partners need to communicate clearly, listen actively, validate feelings, accept responsibility for mistakes, and forgive each other. Couples therapy can help heal wounds, address fears, and build new patterns of interaction.
How trauma affects world trust
Traumas often challenge people's beliefs, values, and assumptions, such as whether life has meaning, if it is worth living, or if society is fair. People who have lost everything or been betrayed may wonder how to start again, distrusting others and feeling hopeless.
Survivors can find new purpose, meaning, and hope through activities that give them agency, connections with people who care, and ways to make positive contributions to others. Focusing on what one has control over rather than outside circumstances can promote mental health.
Maintaining emotional teamwork when trauma erodes trust requires openness, patience, compassion, and professional support. It allows couples to work together towards shared goals, rebuild security and self-esteem, and recover from painful events.
How do couples maintain emotional teamwork when trauma erodes trust in oneself, one's partner, or the world at large?
Couples can maintain emotional teamwork by focusing on shared goals and values that give them purpose and meaning. They can also seek support from their friends, family, or professional counselors who help them rebuild trust after experiencing traumatic events. Moreover, they should communicate openly and honestly about their feelings, thoughts, and concerns with each other, while respecting each other's boundaries and needs.