The traumatic experiences of war can have significant impacts on how soldiers view themselves and the world around them. These altered perspectives may cause difficulties when trying to reintegrate into civilian life and maintain healthy relationships with loved ones who may not understand the changes that they have undergone. This is particularly true when it comes to sexual and romantic interactions between veterans and their partners, where communication about these issues becomes especially challenging.
Soldiers who experience combat often return home feeling disconnected from society and unable to relate to people who haven't shared similar experiences. They may become numb to emotions, including those related to love and intimacy, which makes it difficult for them to engage meaningfully in relationships.
Some soldiers develop hypervigilance or anxiety after witnessing death and destruction, making it harder for them to relax and connect emotionally with others. Other veterans struggle with feelings of guilt or shame associated with killing or being involved in violence. All of these factors can make it hard for veterans to find joy in everyday activities, including sex and affection.
When soldiers try to discuss these experiences with partners, there may be misunderstandings and tension due to differences in perspective. Partners may feel excluded or uninformed, leading to frustration and resentment. Soldiers may also fear judgment or criticism, causing them to avoid bringing up sensitive topics altogether. Communication breakdowns like these can strain relationships and lead to further isolation.
If both parties are willing to work together, it is possible to overcome these obstacles through open dialogue and mutual support.
Couples counseling can provide a safe space for veterans to express themselves without judgement while helping partners understand the impact of trauma on their behavior. Veterans can learn coping strategies for dealing with PTSD symptoms that interfere with intimacy, such as hyperarousal or re-experiencing intrusive thoughts. Partners can also gain insight into how combat affects their loved ones' perceptions of the world, allowing them to become better allies and supporters.
Reconciling altered worldviews from combat with relational values and expectations requires patience, understanding, and effort from both parties. With time, dedication, and communication, however, many military couples can find ways to strengthen their bonds and build lasting connections despite their unique challenges.
How do soldiers reconcile altered worldviews from combat with the relational values and expectations of their partners?
After returning home from combat duty, soldiers may face challenges adapting to the daily life as a civilian and reintegrating into family, community, and social settings where they are expected to act like civilians and conform to the norms of non-combatants. The process of readjustment can take months or even years and include coping mechanisms that help them deal with trauma, PTSD symptoms, and moral injuries associated with military service.