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DISCOVERING GENUINE SEXUAL DESIRE: HOW CULTURE AND SOCIETY IMPACT RELATIONAL CONDITIONING

When considering what drives sexual attraction, many people may believe that their actions are based entirely on physical and emotional attraction to another person.

There is more going on beneath the surface than meets the eye. Psychologists have long studied the relationship between sexual desire and its underlying motivations. There are numerous theories about why certain behaviors occur, and one of them involves how societal norms influence sexual desires. In this article, I will discuss the psychological processes behind differentiating authentic sexual desire from relationally conditioned or socially influenced sexual responses.

Authentic Sexual Desire

To understand this concept better, it is necessary to define what constitutes authentic sexual desire. According to psychologist William Masters and Virginia Johnson, true sexual desire arises spontaneously without conscious effort; it is felt independently of external influences such as social norms, culture, upbringing, expectations, etc.; and it usually coincides with feeling positive about oneself. It's also important to note that genuine sexual desire can lead to pleasure in sex without having an orgasm.

Authentic sexual desire often stems from unconscious mental images, thoughts, feelings, memories, and fantasies that come naturally to individuals. These thoughts do not necessarily involve a particular person but can be stimulated by anything that triggers a reaction within the mind.

Some people might feel an attraction towards someone due to their hair color, body type, or facial features. Others could find themselves drawn to someone because they remind them of a past lover or possess traits similar to their parents. Whatever the reason may be, authentic sexual desire is unpredictable and comes on suddenly, making it difficult for others to control.

The key factor in authentic sexual response is biology. Biologically speaking, humans are wired to reproduce, and this drive manifests itself in various ways throughout life. From infancy through adolescence into adulthood, our bodies change significantly, which contributes to how we view ourselves physically and mentally. As adults, this translates into sexual urges and desires, whether healthy or unhealthy.

A woman may find herself attracted to men who have muscular arms, while another woman may prefer those with a chiseled jawline. Authentic sexual desire arises when these physical qualities trigger a response in us and makes us want to pursue the object of desire further.

Relationally Conditioned Sexual Responses

Relationally conditioned sexual responses are driven by external factors such as social norms, cultural expectations, and upbringing. This type of response occurs when one experiences a sexual attraction to another person based on what society deems "normal." It can also stem from a fear of rejection if the individual doesn't comply with societal standards.

A good example of this phenomenon is when two people meet at a party and become intimate without knowing much about each other. They may engage in sex out of curiosity or boredom rather than because they genuinely desire each other. This behavior happens frequently among teenagers exploring their sexuality for the first time. They may feel pressured to perform acts that go against their authentic desires due to peer pressure. In some cases, individuals may seek validation from others, leading them down a path they wouldn't typically choose otherwise.

Relationally conditioned sexual responses are often influenced by media portrayals of relationships and sex. Movies, TV shows, music videos, and magazines all contribute to how we view love and lust. We see images of idealized couples and perfect bodies, which creates unrealistic expectations for ourselves. As a result, many people feel ashamed of their own body image or don't think they measure up.

Social Influences

Social influences play a significant role in our sexual responses too. When we grow up in certain cultures or environments, we learn particular values that shape how we approach relationships and sex.

Certain religious or ethnic groups might frown upon premarital sex or homosexuality, while others accept it more readily. These beliefs affect our attitudes towards sexuality and influence what turns us on.

Social norms can also impact sexual desire. Suppose someone has always been told that men should be strong and dominant in bed. In that case, they may find themselves attracted to partners who fulfill this expectation even if it goes against their true desires. The same applies when women are expected to submit passively or be submissive during intercourse. If these gender roles conflict with an individual's preferences, it could lead to confusion about what type of partner they truly want in the long run.

Authentic sexual desire is spontaneous, independent, and based solely on biology. On the other hand, relationally conditioned responses arise due to external factors like media portrayals, cultural standards, and peer pressure.

Social influences shape our views on relationships and sex and can create conflicts between what we want and what society expects from us. Understanding these differences allows individuals to make informed decisions regarding their sexuality without feeling pressured into something unnatural.

What psychological processes underlie the differentiation between authentic sexual desire and relationally conditioned or socially influenced sexual responses?

The distinction between authentic sexual desire and relationally conditioned or socially influenced sexual responses can be attributed to various psychological processes that influence an individual's sexual behavior and motivation. One such process is social learning theory which suggests that individuals learn about their sexual desires through observation of others and modeling of behaviors.

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