Psychological Strategies Women Develop to Cope With Jealousy and Emotional Neglect in Religious Polygamy
Polygamous marriages are an ancient institution that still exists today, particularly in Muslim countries where they are allowed under Islamic law. Although it is less common than monogamy, polygamy continues to be practiced among certain groups worldwide, including those who adhere to Mormon teachings. In these situations, women often struggle with feelings of jealousy and emotional neglect due to being shared among multiple partners. Here are some psychological strategies that women develop to cope with this situation:
1. Acceptance - Some women may accept their situation and come to terms with the fact that they will never have complete control over their husband's attention or affections. They learn to live with the knowledge that they must share him with other wives, and focus on their own lives instead of trying to change his behavior. This can lead to greater emotional stability and a sense of self-worth outside of the marriage.
2. Bargaining - Other women may try to negotiate with their husbands for more time and attention by offering them additional services or resources.
They may cook delicious meals or take care of household chores in exchange for extra affection. While this strategy can work in the short term, it can also cause resentment and frustration if it becomes routine rather than occasional.
3. Denial - Another coping mechanism is denial, where women refuse to acknowledge the reality of their situation. They may act as though everything is fine even when it isn't, or pretend not to notice their husband's infidelity.
This approach is ultimately unhealthy and can lead to increased stress and anxiety.
4. Distraction - Women may distract themselves from their feelings of jealousy by focusing on activities like work, hobbies, or socializing with friends. This can help reduce their obsession with their partner's actions and provide an outlet for negative emotions.
It doesn't address the underlying problem and can eventually result in burnout if it becomes too much of an escape.
5. Reframing -
Some women choose to reframe their perception of polygamy and see it as a way to gain more independence and freedom within their relationship. Rather than viewing multiple wives as competition, they recognize that each person has unique strengths and weaknesses that complement one another. This perspective allows them to appreciate the diversity of personalities in their marriage and find value in each individual wife's role.
Religiously sanctioned polygamy can be challenging for women who must share their partners with other wives.
There are several psychological strategies available to cope with these difficult emotions, including acceptance, bargaining, denial, distraction, and reframing. Each woman will need to find what works best for her based on her individual circumstances and level of comfort. By understanding and embracing these coping mechanisms, women can maintain healthy relationships while also preserving their own mental well-being.