The most common cause of relationship problems is chronic stress. Chronic stress can be caused by many factors such as work pressure, family issues, financial troubles, health concerns, and even military deployment. Military couples face unique challenges when it comes to coping with chronic stress due to their frequent deployments and separations from each other. This article will discuss how military partners can develop shared meaning and relational rituals to cope with these challenges.
Let's define "shared meaning." Shared meaning refers to the mutual understanding between partners about what is important to them as individuals and as a couple. It involves communication, compromise, and negotiation. When both partners have a clear understanding of each other's needs and values, they are better able to support one another during difficult times.
Let's talk about "relational rituals." Relational rituals involve activities that partners engage in together to strengthen their relationship and reduce tension. These rituals can include anything from daily check-ins to weekly date nights to special traditions around holidays or anniversaries. These rituals create a sense of connection and intimacy that helps partners feel closer despite being apart.
One way military partners can develop shared meaning is by setting goals for themselves as a couple. Goals give partners something to work towards together and help them stay connected while separated.
Setting a goal to save money for a vacation or saving for retirement creates a sense of purpose and motivation for both partners.
Partners can set goals related to their careers, personal development, or parenting to keep them focused on their individual identities outside of their relationship.
Another way military partners can develop shared meaning is by practicing active listening. Active listening involves paying attention to your partner's words and body language to understand their thoughts and feelings. This requires you to put aside any preconceived notions or judgments and truly listen to what your partner has to say. Practicing active listening can help build trust and respect between partners.
Relational rituals also play an important role in coping with chronic stress. One common relational ritual is the "I miss you" card. Military couples often write letters or send emails when they are away from each other. The "I miss you" card involves writing down all the things you love about your partner and why you miss them. Then, when you send the card, you express how much you appreciate them and look forward to seeing them again soon. This simple act of appreciation can go a long way in strengthening a relationship.
Other relational rituals include regular check-ins, special date nights, and communication apps like Skype or FaceTime. Regular check-ins allow partners to catch up on daily life, address concerns, and share moments of joy. Special date nights give partners a chance to reconnect and spend time together without distractions. Communication apps make it easier to stay connected even when separated by distance.
Developing shared meaning and relational rituals is essential for military couples dealing with chronic stress and separation. By setting goals, practicing active listening, and engaging in relational rituals, partners can create a strong bond that can weather the challenges of deployment.
How do military partners develop shared meaning and relational rituals to cope with chronic stress and separation?
In their quest for mutual support, military partners may engage in activities that reinforce a sense of togetherness and create positive memories despite being apart from each other. These practices can include sharing photos, sending messages daily, keeping a countdown calendar until the next reunion, and having dinner together at the same time every week.