Gendered expectations of sexual performance are social norms that influence how men and women are expected to behave during sexual encounters.
Men are often expected to be dominant, assertive, aggressive, and willing to take initiative, while women are expected to be passive, submissive, and responsive to their partner's desires. These gendered expectations can affect both partners' satisfaction with the sexual experience and overall happiness within the relationship.
When a man feels pressured to perform well in bed, he may feel stressed and anxious about living up to his partner's expectations. This pressure can lead him to engage in risky behavior such as watching pornography for ideas or trying new techniques without asking for consent. If these strategies don't work, it can result in frustration and resentment toward his partner. On the other hand, if he succeeds, he may feel proud and satisfied, but this success is usually temporary since his partner will likely want more of the same next time.
When a woman expects her partner to be dominant and aggressive, she may become upset if he doesn't live up to her expectations. She may believe he isn't masculine enough or strong enough to satisfy her sexually, leading to lower self-esteem and dissatisfaction in the relationship. Even worse, if she has been abused or traumatized in the past, these expectations could trigger negative emotions and memories, creating an even bigger rift between them.
Gendered expectations of sexual performance put unnecessary pressure on both partners, making it difficult to communicate openly and honestly about what they want and need from each other. It also creates unrealistic standards that are impossible to meet consistently, resulting in feelings of failure and disappointment. Instead, couples should focus on communication, understanding, and respecting their partner's boundaries rather than worrying about meeting specific performance criteria.
How do gendered expectations of sexual performance influence sexual behavior and relationship satisfaction?
Gendered expectations of sexual performance can have a significant impact on sexual behavior and relationship satisfaction in both heterosexual and same-sex relationships. In heterosexual relationships, men are often expected to be sexually aggressive and assertive, while women are expected to be passive and receptive partners. This can lead to pressure and anxiety for both parties, as they may feel that their performance is not up to par with cultural standards.