What dimensions of care, obligation, entitlement, radical hospitality are teased out when we speak of chosen queer families, networks, friendships beyond blood‑ties?
A family is an important part of human life that consists of people who are related to each other either through birth or marriage.
There are some individuals who do not feel attached to their biological family due to various reasons. In such cases, they tend to form their own "chosen" families which include those friends and acquaintances they consider close and share strong bonds with. These kinds of relationships can be referred to as "queer", which implies non-traditional or alternative ways of living one's life. Queerness is about being different from what society considers normal. It also involves exploring new identities, challenging norms, and redefining oneself. This essay will explore how chosen queer families, networks, and friendships go beyond blood ties and highlight the dimensions of care, obligation, entitlement, and radical hospitality involved in these relationships.
Care
Care refers to the act of providing physical, emotional, and psychological support to someone who needs it. When it comes to chosen queer families, this dimension takes a significant role as members often depend on one another for love, companionship, and moral support.
Let's take the case of two gay men who have been together for decades. They may not have any children or relatives but still feel responsible for each other's well-being. One partner may become ill or suffer from depression while the other takes care of him/her until he/she gets better. The same goes for lesbian couples who might face discrimination and marginalization in society. In such situations, they look after each other emotionally and physically because they know that nobody else would do it for them.
Obligation
The next dimension is obligation. This means having an ethical or moral duty to fulfill a certain responsibility. People in chosen queer families are bound by their mutual commitment towards each other. They promise to be there for one another in good times and bad times, no matter what happens. If one member falls sick, the others tend to his/her needs without hesitation. They also share financial responsibilities if required. In fact, some people even adopt children so that their loved ones can raise them in a loving environment. It is worth mentioning here that being part of a chosen family does not imply legal obligations like those of biological families.
Entitlement
Entitlement refers to the right of access, benefit, or privilege. Members of a chosen queer family often feel entitled to each other's lives and emotions. They trust and rely on each other implicitly without fearing betrayal or rejection.
Imagine a group of transgender individuals who have been through hell together due to societal stigma and prejudice. They understand each other's struggles and support each other during difficult moments. They believe that their connection is deeper than blood ties and cannot be broken easily. Their entitlement makes them feel secure about their future together and motivates them to work hard towards achieving common goals.
Radical Hospitality
Radical hospitality involves extending kindness, warmth, and acceptance to guests, strangers, or outsiders. Chosen queer families often practice this principle by welcoming new members into their fold with open arms. These relationships are based on love, respect, and mutual understanding rather than blood ties. People in such families do not discriminate against anyone because they know that everyone deserves equal treatment irrespective of background, caste, religion, etc. They believe in diversity and inclusivity as these values make life more meaningful and joyous.
Chosen queer families, networks, and friendships go beyond blood-ties and involve multiple dimensions such as care, obligation, entitlement, and radical hospitality. They provide emotional, physical, financial, social, and psychological support to their members so that they can live a fulfilling life despite facing challenges from society at large.
What dimensions of care, obligation, entitlement, radical hospitality are teased out when we speak of chosen queer families, networks, friendships beyond blood‑ties?
Chosen queer families, networks, and friendships have become increasingly common among LGBTQ+ individuals as they seek support from people who share their experiences. These relationships can take on various forms and provide different types of care, obligations, entitlements, and hospitality. In general, these bonds often involve mutual trust, understanding, loyalty, and reciprocity. They may also be characterized by a shared sense of belonging and purpose.